Motherhood

So have you ever felt like you have nothing left to give?  Well, this past Sunday morning, that's what I woke up feeling like.  I think it has a lot to do with Brad being gone and me spending what seems like every day with the kids with little relief.  I think to myself, well, women in the 1800's didn't need a "girls night out" did they?  Why is this so hard for me?  I mean, men went to war and left women with their children for years at a time.  So, I guess I was feeling sorry for myself.  I told Brad about it and he didn't understand so I tried to explain.  When Tenille drops her cup off the table and she's strapped in, I get to pick it up for her.  When they need to go potty, I have to take them.  When Dylan is hungry, I feed him.  I love being their mother and I feel like there is no greater responsibility.  The next day I got over it, but then it got me thinking what was said in General Conference this last session.  

Elder Ballard said: We need to remember that the full commitment of motherhood and of putting children first can be difficult. Through my own four-generation experience in our family, and through discussions with mothers of young children throughout the Church, I know something of a mother’s emotions that accompany her commitment to be at home with young children. There are moments of great joy and incredible fulfillment, but there are also moments of a sense of inadequacy, monotony, and frustration. Mothers may feel they receive little or no appreciation for the choice they have made. Sometimes even husbands seem to have no idea of the demands upon their wives.  

I love what he says, it shows exactly what what I have been feeling.  It would be so much easier to put my kids in day care and go back to work.  Working outside of the home is EASY!  But being home with my kids is where I WANT to be and will continue being.  I feel like I just need to chill out sometimes and let things go.  I just need to enjoy my kids now because it won't be long and they will be all grown up and in school and then I will look around my empty house and wonder, "what now".  I feel like this is my responsibility and I need to relish in it!